Once There Were Wolves, Charlotte McConaghy

I got this book in my Book of the Month club box. I chose it because of the cover, and I am not ashamed to admit it. Because, I mean...look how beautiful that cover is! Once I opened the book though, I realized that I had no idea what I had gotten myself into.

The main character in this novel is Inti, who has a twin sister named Aggie. Throughout the novel, we get snippets of their past and they're woven in perfectly to support the arc of the novel. We learn that Inti and Aggie are inseparable, that they once lived in Alaska with their father until he went off to die in the woods, and so they returned home to Australia and their mother. Inti has a condition called mirror-touch, in which her brain registers the physical feelings of others. You get a paper cut, she feels your paper cut. You get a hug, she feels your hug. It makes for a very interesting and very challenging life.

Something happens in their past that removes Inti's ability to trust, to want to love anyone except Aggie. But when she meets Duncan, things change. Things happen. There is a murder. There is an investigation. There is protection and misdirection and despair...there are wolves. There is beauty. I really feel that McConaghy did an excellent job at invoking the feelings of her readers. I feel that she lit the landscape up around me and I was in Scotland with Inti. Her world building was wonderful, even though looking back at it I don't recall over the top descriptors, which I tend to love.

Though there were times where I didn't understand Inti or Aggie and they would irritate me. I found myself - on several occasions - feeling exasperated or confused by their behavior. But I kept reading, and the further I got, the more I understood. That makes sense, obviously. But I still found myself being frustrated with Inti and her inability to let people in. Once I got to the end of the book and the big reveal, it made sense wby I didn't understand. It made sense why I was frustrated with her. My whole perspective shifted, and it's pretty cool that an author can do that.

There were moments in this book where I felt McConaghy's words on my skin in a way I haven't in a long time, and I felt that she has a beautiful way of writing. It's pretty evident that I enjoyed it, but not just for the writing style. It triggered so many emotions in me that I wasn't anticipating and forced me to confront them. I think it is human nature to run from what makes us uncomfortable, and McCanaghy does a wonderful job representing that nature with her characters.

This book made me feel feelings. I felt joy, excitement, fear, anger, apprehension. It went deeper than I thought it would. It was more difficult than I thought it would be. Not the story, but some of the content. On the surface this book is about the re-wilding of Scotland by re-introducing wolves into the environment. By doing this, it would allow the herbivore populations to dwindle, allowing new forest and land growth. Beneath the surface, this book is about the profound vastness of the human spirit, the uncharted lengths we will go to in order to protect what is dear to us.

go read something lovely, bookworms.

xoxo

is.

*please note that this book is full of triggering situations and may not be suitable for sensitive readers.